Enjoyed spring thunderstorms the last couple days. The wind, not so much.
Goofing with special effects on Ulead PhototImpact 5 Bundled Edition from yesteryear.
Sometimes I have the coolest dreams. I don’t remember them as vividly as I used to when I was younger but here is an example of my very active nights!
I was looking at the house from the outside. Looked a little like that oddly shaped house in the Amityville Horror. My sons were both with me looking for a house to move into. We decided to go inside to look around. It was quite dark and had many closed doors along the sides of the endless, narrow hallway. I knew I watched too many episodes of Dark Shadows growing up. I began opening the doors and looking inside. They were empty. My kids had gone further down the hall so I was alone. I opened another door and saw a really awesome statue that looked like one of those religious saints. It was quite large. I started to walk over to get a better look and the statue began moving, slowly at first. You know that feeling that you swear something is happening but you must be imagining it, then you realize it’s really happening?
I started to back up and saw the figure begin to awaken as if it was actually alive. I turned to run out the door and the hall had turned into an amusement park. I was screaming for my kids, but they were nowhere in sight. I started running past buildings and went inside one of them. It was really huge like a warehouse and very dark inside. There were others milling about, but really too dark to see who anyone was. There were open doors along the very wide hall. It sort of felt like a mall in a blackout. I was in mall during a bad storm once many years ago they lost power due to a twister. This reminded of it. All of a sudden I saw my dog that had passed the year before but it was like he was still here with me. I was holding his body close to mine and said “We’re going to have to do this boy, it’s going to be OK,” or something like that, took his leash and started walking with him in the lead. I could feel the strong cold wind blowing on us, pushing us back like a horrible storm had just cropped up.
Then I awoke.
The window was left open and there was a cool breeze blowing in from outside. I think the dream was just basically there’s a lot of difficulty and uncertainty in life, but that you have to continue and everything will be alright or as it should be.
“Homes are a great investment.”
“And even if they don’t keep going up in value, I will at least be able to sell my home for what I paid for it with all the sweat equity and improvements.”
Those were the kinds of comments and thought behind the purchase of a home I made at the end of 2004, at what was to be the height of the mortgage movement, right before the meltdown.
After losing my job years ago, I have managed to hang on to this interest only ARM between other part-time jobs and unemployment.
I am now facing repayment of the principle in a home that been washed out in the eye of that mortgage storm. It is now worth approximately half of what I now owe on both mortgages. The mortgage “expert” did no money down because she could just mortgage this into my home payments, easy peasy my arse!
The new payments to come will be over $500. more a month and I can’t afford the current payments. I have run out of all savings and almost all options at this time so I guess when it rains it really does “poor.”
What makes me angry is the fact that all this has happened through no fault of my own. Since I purchased my home as a much older woman I as well as the banks knew that I would never be able to pay that home off in my lifetime since they had access to all my financial information. I had planned on selling it a few years down the line for at least what I paid of it, no problem. This was not to be since within a couple of years there was trouble in the mortgage industry and the value of my home was down about $10,000 or so. I decided to try and keep it longer in hopes the value would soon rebound. My bad!
I played by the rules, this was not what I wanted to happen but it has. I think of a number of people I knew that deliberately walked away from their homes beside the fact that they still could afford the payments at the time. Now they have everything so slanted to help the mortgage companies only and the hell with private citizens trying to survive. This is killing me because I have an immaculate credit history and I am very anal retentive. What makes me angry is they will harass and molest me and try to make me look like the bad guy, even though I have no choice or control in what has happened in my circumstances and they are the very ones that caused all these problems.
I have begun to get documentation together to sue my original mortgage company to at least take this predatory mortgage off my hands if I can do this pro-bono! Wish me luck!